Two Days

In two days,  your memorial happens.

Two days.

I sat at your bedside for eleven days. I said so many things,  told you how loved you were,  took a list in with me the last night I saw you to say every last thing I could think of saying and I still feel like I haven’t said goodbye.

At the time I remember saying I’d never say goodbye because you’ll always be with me.  I feel like I’ll be going to watch other people say goodbye,  but my heart knows in some way,  I’ve got to say a kind of letting go goodbye.  You will still always be with me,  but I’m going to have to cut a cord or something.  I don’t feel like I’ll ever have closure or peace, but I’m desperately craving and seeking both.

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About iwentcrazy

I am very, very, very average. And very, very, very lucky.

Posted on July 29, 2015, in Death, grief, Honey Bee, Life, Love and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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