A Secure Feeling
It took most of the day, but I did it. All the boxes I wanted, not just needed, but wanted to unpack, have been unpacked. All of the kitchen stuff I want to get at of mine, has been married in with his stuff. I organized his kitchen cupboards and did what he said a girl needs to do…nested.
He hasn’t seen it yet, but I am pretty sure he realized what he would be coming home to since I was looking through his cupboards containing pots, pans, and baking things and he asked what I was looking for. I just smiled and said, “Something to organize.” He smiled.
I went through my room and rearranged things so I was no longer bumping into stuff, and could find things.
You know what I feel like as I begin to let go and reclaim my life?
It’s OK for me to fly again. It’s OK for me to be excited about feeling secure and doing this thing Mr. Yummy and I are doing. To me, it all feels right. It really shook me when he said, “I know you, you dwell on things and you will use it to hurt yourself. I try to be nice to myself. Then he snickered and said, “Most of the time. And you should be nice to yourself too.”
This morning before he left, I thanked him for being selfish and self-centered and not letting me do anything. He smiled at me and said, “A girl has gotta nest.” So, nesting is what I did. I asked Mel, to please understand my need to get back to the now. I think she would. She would feel pretty shitty if I let her death derail the tracks I was trucking on down.
Till we meet again, my love.
Posted on February 22, 2015, in Honey Bee, Love, Me, Rabbit Hole, Relationships, Universe, Yummy and tagged death, depression, Freedom, grateful, learning, Life lessons, Love, Mel, my best friend, Spinal Cord Infarction, Thankful, The One, Yummy. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.