Stories (and the one I won’t be telling)


December 18, 2011 7:58 AM

I have been very excited about my one year anniversary or, if you will my birthday. I have been so excited about it I wanted to scream to the world to look at where I was and look at where I am now!! After some reflecting I have decided that the story I have ready, sitting in my drafts, waiting to be published will not be told. Not in the way I was going to tell it.

I have decided that there will me no mention of the traumas. There will be no dragging up again the negative energies I allowed into my life once before. I do not want to give them face time because they are not the here and now. They are not rooted in love. They do not feed my intent to manifest love. My desire, my entire life has been about love. As far back as I can remember.

I always wanted more love than I got, I always needed more love than I felt. I always looked for love to rescue me, make me whole, fix me. I was waiting for someone else’s love. What I needed was to have that epiphany, that knowing that I deserve nothing less than love, as do you…but I needed it first and foremost, from myself.

It took me a long time to get here. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that this year has had purpose, intent, and has taken me where I was meant to be. I am attracting things to my life that are beautiful. I can taste and feel energies around me at every turn.

Never did I think I would be standing here, releasing all my shit. I mean really letting go of it because it has no importance. It feeds NOTHING positive, it gives not to love, and I AM love.

So I will continue, I will smile, and dance, laugh and sing, I may even have a cocktail to celebrate my 1 year of my Love Tour (there, I said it…I CAN own it here on this new anonymous blog and not give a rip if you figure out who I am!) but my story, shall not include the traumas that led me to break down and simply cry to the Universe, “No More Trauma!!! I can’t fucking take it anymore!”

Instead I will tell you that the trauma was bad enough, it was my breaking point. From my break, I found true love. I found the belief, that I deserve nothing less than love, as do you. I found that if I put it out there, it comes back. I found that other people were living in love. I found that water seeks its own level. I found not only my connection to the Source, but that I am part of the Source, the kiss of breath.

I began to breathe. I begin to inhale and really take it in. I began to breathe deep and haarp out X-Class flares of love. I went so far down the rabbit hole, I will never be able to go back to who I used to be.

I am counting the days to my one year.

I have never been more grateful for anything in my entire life. I told a friend today that I have been walking around weeping, but not sad. I explained that I KNOW my reason for being here, and what my purpose is, and I was told it sounds like I have reached a state of Grace. I do not know if that is what I am experiencing, but I wish to share it with you.

Thank you for reading and remember…I deserve nothing less than love, as do you!


About iwentcrazy

I am very, very, very average. And very, very, very lucky.

Posted on December 5, 2012, in Rabbit Hole, Universe and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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