In My Closet
We all have one. I’ve been going through mine in ways few understand.
Beneath it all is love. I can’t tell anyone how to live, what to look for, how to do it, but this is my truth, my perspective, my reality.
Becoming love is something I never “intended”, but I did, because that is where I am. A better set of words, might be that I didn’t realize that rooting myself in the belief I deserve nothing less than love, as do you, meant that I was making love my total intent.
December 18th, 2012 will be my one year. It took me a little time to move out, box at a time…but it was that morning after the assault that I felt it switch inside me. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to put that moment into words, but it was clarity. From December to March and April, the ride of love was powerful, emotional, revealing, joyous, painful, and so many other adjectives that it is pointless to list them.
I have had to work very hard to NOT live old patterns, react in familiar ways, think from different places, and follow my heart, intuition, intent of living in love.
And so I have fallen in love with you, us, them, we: The people.
I would say that this year has been a huge spiritual journey for me. Soul searching. Questioning. Looking. Full of the intent to find me. And I did.
In that moment I BECAME love. Pulsing like the sun. I thought of three particular people (and all the people in between us) and I let fly a love flare, that rivaled any solar flare seen on SOHO.
I weep, and think, “How odd, the things you find in your closet.”